this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2024
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Cyberdyne Systems, Wayland-Yutani Corporation, Tyrell Corporation, or Arasaka Corporation? Something else?

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[–] [email protected] 76 points 5 days ago (4 children)

Nah nothing that cool. A megacorp that has so much influence that it doesn't need a military of its own. It knows everything it needs to about everyone, can sway public opinion as it wishes, and will continue to enmesh itself into every aspect of private and public life. It produces no products. We are the products, and we are the consumers.

And it's already here: Google, Meta, whatever Elon Musk is doing idk.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 5 days ago

So, Evil Corp, then

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago

Sometimes the companies they subcontract, named something boring and innocuous like Isolace Data Systems or Wimblo Digital or some shit, fucks up spectacularly.

Like they'll just have 400gb Excel spreadsheet called all_meta_usernames_and_passwords.xlsx stored in the company's shared intranet and then some dude guesses the WiFi password was WimbloDigital2024 and leaks it to whoever.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Pizza Hut's biggest mistake was selling off their war-fleet.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Which was a shame as Taco bell won the fast food wars.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Yeah I don't see how anyone can not see it's Google... Who else is even close to having all our data? All the web searches, mobile android play backend, maps, Google streetcar, etc etc... They know everything.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

The world got its first dystopian megacorp several hundred years ago and it was called the East India Company

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago
[–] [email protected] 41 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Pssst, Amazon already exists...

If we have to go by a fictional one, I think OCP.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

You down with OCP (Yeah you know me)

Who's down with OCP (Every last homie)

You down with OCP (Yeah you know me)

Who's down with OCP (All the homies)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

I'm not sure if that's OC or a reference I'm not cultured enough to understand, but I can absolutely imagine a modern OCP advertising jingle like that, showing how down with everyone OCP is and totally not evil in any shape or form. The TV ad of course shows people dancing to it like it's some coke ad.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

Reference to "OPP" by Naughty by Nature, late 80s hip-hop.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 5 days ago (2 children)

The joke's on us, we've been in the dystopic megacorp era since the 00's.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

80s. Check out Snow Crash.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

The similarities I see between them and the Aztec corporation from shadowrun is pretty astounding. Both primarily sell consumer goods.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 5 days ago

Fucking Nestle

[–] [email protected] 21 points 5 days ago

RobCo

Military contractor and aerospace giant obsessed with autonomous AI.

Replace Robert House with El*n and it's halfway there already.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Umbrella Corp.

Or possibly Conglomo (from Rocko's Modern Life). They own everything and are run by two dip shits.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago

Weyland-Yutani canonically merged with Wal-Mart, so Wal-Mart.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago

That's Amazon.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Tyrell, because Paypalpatine wants his sex robots, ands that means replicants.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Paypalpatine

chefs kiss

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

But the other Paypalpatine is building the precrime Minority Report machine. We're really getting the worst of all these fucking shitheads combined.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Taco Bell

SpoilerDemolition Man

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

"Veridian Dynamics. People Lie. Companies protect their interests. It's different."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

It's all of them, all at once. Yesterday.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

It's called the United States of America

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

We get Qualityland's "The Shop" if we like it or not.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago

We need to revive the neon sign industry at least

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Welcome to Costco. I love you

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I could really go for a Starbucks right now.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

We don't have time for a hand job.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

I'm holding out for Aperture Science, if for no other reason than that their AI has a dry, dark sense of humor.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

Ares macrotechnology. Guns, cars, space, a private military/police force, and 'Mom and Apple pie.'

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Virtucon (Dr Evil's org in Austin Powers)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Mao-Kwikowski Mercantile, with their subsidiary Protogen.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Aint the Standard Oil is the OG that "pioneered" many of the bread and butter tactics of acquiring and abusing monopoly market power?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

Brondo, the thirst mutilator.

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