Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.
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Posts in this community must be of property (inside or out) listed for sale which contains a terrible element. “Terrible” can refer to:
the photo itself (finger over the lens, too far away, people in the shot, bad Photoshop, etc.)
the property (weird layout, questionable plumbing, unsound structure, etc.)
the interior (carpeted bathrooms, awful taste interiors, weird mannequins/taxidermies/art, inflatable pools indoors, etc.)
the actual listing itself including unusual descriptions and unrealistic pricing. However, this isn’t a community to discuss the housing market in general. This is a comedic community - let’s keep it light.
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Censor any names/contact details of private individuals.
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This community follows the rules of the feddit.uk instance and the lemmy.org code of conduct. I’ve summarised them here:
The house seems a bit on the ostentatious side, and then...
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/156467825#%2F%3Fchannel=RES_BUY
Don't overlook those sinks - they're weird. I was very disappointed by the toilets though, very functional. Luckily you get to scroll past an actual pulpit first.
Do you think they give sermons to their dog from that pulpit or something?
Oh I suspect everyone in the house has had a good talking to from that.
"Jimmy, you forgot the 'no solids in the lav after midnight rule. Father is waiting in the pulpit."
First thought upon seeing the sink: https://img.ltwebstatic.com/images3_spmp/2024/04/12/c9/171291577263e3fdea013226a66f982d442920cff2_thumbnail_900x.webp
It's like the owner rocked up at a church that was closing down and said "we'll take the lot".
Especially what looks like a font being used as a bathroom sink.
How much for the consecrated altar you cowards?
Most of the seating in the house looks about as comfortable as a pew.
That looks like it's a baptismal font by the sink? That raises more questions.
The baptismal font is the sink. It looks weirder next to that very ordinary bog.
This looks like 5 different houses in the photos. Crazy.
I was not expecting the rest of the house to be like it was. I really liked the Mondrian inspired kitchen and the bathroom sink was actually pretty cool. The whole house just feels so disjointed though, nothing cohesive.
Do you think the realtors who sell these properties, when they learn of the place, go "ah fuck" or get excited?
It probably depends more on the sellers expectations. Like if they want to recoup the money they spent getting this look that's difficult. If they're like yeah I've made it weird af so I know the buyer is probably going to do a pretty involved renovation and so isn't going to pay full price.
When I was like, 2, I had one of those "See and say" toys, you pull the cord on the side, the arrow spins, it lands on a picture and says something relevant to that picture. If I understand right, at least at the time these had a kind of phonograph record in them with several concentric tracks, so where the arrow came to rest is where the phonograph would start playing. Mine was about nursery rhymes. It developed a skip in the track about the woman in the shoe, so it started to say "There was an old woman who lived in- Oh My." Because it would either skip to the end of that track or to an adjacent one that ended that way. And the exact way it said that has been seared into my head meat for 35 years.
Reminds me of a string-pull E.T. toy I had. Something must have been slightly off with the record, because he was supposed to say "E.T.! E.T.! E.T.!" but instead, he said, "Eaty.! Eaty! Feety!" (He pronounces it like 'eaty' in the recording all three times and he does in the movie as well) I liked it. And much like you, I think "feety" whenever I see E.T.
That thing better have a slide
Never thought of making a kitchen Mondrian art...
I admit I do like that part of the house.
...who was gifted a golden canoe
She declined since it was
Just a bit too much fuss
to do Eskimo Rolls in her loo
Is that a shower in the pulpit? Lol
Also, either they pulled a sheet over the bed without a mattress or someone likes sleeping on the rack..
It's known as Japanese-inspired sleeping arrangements, thank you very much. It's very chic right now.
This house brought to you by generative AI.
My brain cannot process the angles in picture 36 at all.
It's like an Escher painting.
They're denying you a raise or a job so that they can live like this. Remember that.
You found Carry Bradshaw's vacation home!
There once was a stripper who bathed in a shoe, His name was Neil and he liked the water blue...
I don't know why she bathed in a shoe. Perhaps she'll poo.
I hope she cleans up after herself.
