this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 96 points 6 months ago (4 children)

You'll find an npm package to help you count up to 2.

(I recently learned - maybe here - that the is-even package has over 170k weekly downloads)

[–] [email protected] 83 points 6 months ago (2 children)

What's even wilder is if you look at the code of that package, all it does is include the is-odd package and then return !is-odd. And the is-odd package isn't much better, it does some basic checks on the input and then returns n % 2 === 1.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I thought I was missing something. JS is one of my main languages and I always just write the is-odd function myself since it's like 10 characters. It boggles the mind that is-even has 176k weekly downloads

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (3 children)

To be fair having a name can make things easier to read. I get that i % 2 == 0 is a common pattern and most programmers will quickly recognize what is happening. But isEven(i) is just that much easier to grok and leaves that brainpower to work on something else.

But I would never import a package for it. I would just create a local helper for something this trivial.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago

Is-even continues to be the best joke in the industry

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Oh boy, this actually made me laugh out loud

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

This must be a "hold my beer" kind of joke and someone wanting to see how far they can take it.

[–] [email protected] 71 points 6 months ago
  1. it's easy to make fun of
  2. it makes every other programming language look better in comparison
[–] [email protected] 65 points 6 months ago
  1. It runs in browsers
  2. If you hate your co-workers, then they will also feel your pain.
[–] [email protected] 64 points 6 months ago (7 children)
  1. You can call it "Java" to enrage other programmers
  2. You can compare numbers against strings without wasting time converting them
[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Array(16).join("wat" - 1) + " Batman!";

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)
  1. It's not PHP.
  2. I don't know. I didn't think I'd get this far.
[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago
  • It's not PHP
  • It's already implemented in browsers
[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (2 children)

PHP has gotten really good over the past few versions, actually. Lots of really great stuff has been added, it feels like it resembles rust more every release lol

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 6 months ago
  1. It runs in the browser
  2. Web developers know it already so we might as well
[–] [email protected] 59 points 6 months ago (5 children)
  1. Job security
  2. its not COBOL
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[–] [email protected] 56 points 6 months ago (1 children)
  1. It has the simplest multi-threaded implementation: no threads!
  2. You can goof off while your build system takes 20 minutes to rebuild a non-compiled language
[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

node_modules size of a Linux distro

[–] [email protected] 45 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

1 - Easiest way to run a script in your browser
2 - Always finds its way if inputs are bad
Nan - undefined

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago (7 children)

NaN is of type number. because fuck me.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

To be fair, this is actually reasonable. But it does look stupid on the face of it.

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[–] [email protected] 41 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I am forced to try to get a JS certification.

I am reaching the end of my rope, and starting to think of maybe putting my neck into one.

Isaac Newton said that we see far because we stand on the shoulders of giants.

Javascript is like standing on the shoulders of dwarves with brittle bone disease.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 6 months ago
  1. Ubiquitous; insane amount of libraries and probably some of the best documentation of any language
  2. JS lambda function syntax is nice
[–] [email protected] 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)

It leads to typescript

You get surprises from npm

[–] [email protected] 28 points 6 months ago (10 children)

I spent way too long today figuring out why my app was doing something that it's NOT supposed to do on weekends.

I read Luxon's docs (pretty cool lib tbh) again and again, and tried everything I could think of to get isWeekend to return a sane result.

Turns out I was pulling a somewhat older version of Luxon, where isWeekend didn't exist. In any sane language, I expect I'd get a huge warning about a property that doesn't exist, but alas...

Typescript helps me keep my sanity, but juuuuust barely.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

If isWeekend doesn't exist, then the weekend doesn't exist, so it's naturally false.

That's why JavaScript gets pushed so hard - it's part of the capitalist agenda to keep us working 7 days a week

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago

You get suprises from npm

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago

await and async

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)
  1. Is available to be used in website scripting.
  2. Not quite as full of footguns as PHP (although it is close).
[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

PHP is actually quite footgun free these days.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (11 children)

The part that always gets me is when people choose Js for the backend. Like I get that it's the default thing that works on the frontend, so there's some rationale why you might not want to transpile to it from another language. On the backend though, there are so many far better option, why would you willingly go with Js, especially given that you're now forced to do all your IO async.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (2 children)

It has a cup of coffee as logo

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (3 children)

That’s Java, not Javascript. Java is to javascript as ham is to hamster.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

Write down any NaN advantages of JavaScript

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

A lot of people are familiar with it and........um....hackers like it being in use?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (6 children)

It runs in browsers. It… isn’t poop? I don’t know. I’m all out of ideas.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (6 children)

God people it's getting old

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago (7 children)
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[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago

We have forced it, quite hamfistedly, to do anything. The organic hell-evolution of web browsers turned them into do-anything sandboxed mini-OS. It meant whatever hellish code you used to write your corporate mandated web app could now become a perfectly bloated standalone application. And the demonic language that would enable it was called Javascript. It does the backend and it does the frontend. You could consider those advantages over other devices, like toasters and those handheld electronic games from the 80s.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Browsers love it!

Practically anything you write will execute without all that scope and well formed statements nonsense.

Mind you, number 2 is also its biggest flaw as well, but…

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago
  1. It at least feels slightly little bit like lisp.
  2. Shit I'm f*ed

.. ah right, it runs on any browser. Lame

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You can make minecraft mods

[–] [email protected] 47 points 6 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago
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