this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2023
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During covid times I heard many interesting conspiracy predictions such as the value is money will fall to zero, the whole society will collapse, the vaccine will kill 99% of the population etc. None of those things have happened yet, but can you add some other predicitons to the list?

Actually, long before covid hit, there were all sorts of predictions floating around. You know, things like the 2008 recession will cause the whole economy to collapse and then we’ll go straight to Mad Max style post-apocalyptic nightmare or 9/11 was supposed to start WW3. I can’t even remember all the predictions I’ve heard over the years, but I’m sure you can help me out. Oh, just remembered that someone said that paper and metal money will disappear completely by year xyz. At the time that date was like only a few years away, but now it’s more like 10 years ago or something. Still waiting for that one to come true…

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[–] [email protected] 91 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Economic doomsayers have predicted ten out of the last three recessions.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I mean, we never fixed the problems which caused 2008. Covid didn't exactly help with anything.

I'm also constantly suprised the world goes by like we aren't facing the biggest economic reality check ever.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (4 children)

To be clear: Doomsayers always say there's a recession about to happen, and are only sometimes correct. If you always bet on doom, you'll be wrong most of the time.

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Are people still camped out at Dealey Plaza in Dallas waiting for JFK to return and tell us Trump is the 18th president?

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Of all the bizarre shit, this one I feel stands alone. I miss my outlook on humanity pre-2019….maybe pre-2016…

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Right?! We call it "The before times" now in my circle. It's so stark, it's similar to how everything changed after 9/11.

Ironically, in my bubble of life/friends there are two camps, like you stated and I am in camp 2016. I always use the night the Cubs won the world series as my benchmark ;) nothing has been the same since.

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Haven't the 5G rays made you gay yet??

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

I just felt it start to kick in recently.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But wasn’t the vaccine supposed to contain the gay gene? If so, what happens if you get both? Could the different gay effects cancel each other out? What if you were already gay before all of this happened? I have so many questions.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I believe it's gay in case you get one of em, trans if you get two. If you were already gay and get both you now buy coffee and avacado toast every morning too. If you were a gay trans person and got both, the researchers blow their own minds out instead of trying to figure it out

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 year ago

if 10% of the workforce telecommutes we can end our foreign oil dependence by 1975

[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 year ago (2 children)
  • Jesus was supposed to return
  • The world was supposed to end
[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 year ago (8 children)

Jesus was supposed to return before all the disciples died. All current christians conveniently forget that part

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yeah in the new testament they speak about it like it's gonna happen any day now. They've been saying "any day now" for 2000 years. They're like Toronto Maple Leafs fans waiting to win the Cup.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I mean, we're fast approaching the 3rd anniversary of my first Covid vaccine dose, and I'm still waiting to drop dead the way they promised.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm at 6 doses looking to get my 7th by the end of October. The only ones who keep seeming to drop dead are the anti vaxxers.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 year ago (7 children)

They only just sent the activation signal with wednesdays alert. Its only a matter of time before a lot of yall drop dead. Then the commies in mexico and canada are going invade. They're already poised to do so!

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The end of the world in 2012. Some say it started in 2012.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (2 children)

With the way all the Maya stuff was presented as mysteries of an ancient civilization, it was a real surprise for me to find out the Maya are just, like, there. If you want to know the deal with the Maya calendar you can just ask them. They're the ones stood outside the archeological sites selling t-shirts.

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[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)
  1. Endemic COVID. (This one is basically true.)

  2. Computers will make everything so efficient that workers will work fewer and fewer hours, and we will need to seriously consider what to do with all of our leisure time. (This could be true if it weren't for employers exploiting those efficiencies.)

  3. Unions will disappear. (Looks like the opposite is happening, possibly based on #2.)

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Don’t know about America, but in Europe labor unions are an integral part of the society. This way, employees don’t need to negotiate the wages, salaries, maternity leave, vacations and other details. The unions have much more leverage in the negotiations, because they can always threaten the employer with a strike. As different industries go through their negotiations, you’ll end up hearing about strikes every year. Some times it’s pilots, some times it’s nurses, lorry drivers or whatever. Every year there’s something like this going on when the two parties are unable to find common ground.

Why would the unions ever disappear? I just don’t get it.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Billionaires and corporations here in America have been actively attacking unions for decades. They fund "think-tanks" that spread the idea to workers that unions are stealing their money and are bad for them while lobbying the government to weaken union rights. It has been very effective, union membership in the US has dropped significantly. It is only recently that unions have started to grow again here.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Paperless office, late nineties.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (7 children)

my current and previous jobs were indeed paperless. and i'm not alone.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Specific predictions are almost always going to flop. Wiser people who monitor the collapse of civilization are careful to note that it's a process, not a discrete event. You can see the process in action all around us in the form of wildfires, market volatility, the hollowing out of schools and hospitals, flooding cities, etc.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Even wiser people will notice that catastrophe has always been a part of society. Climate change is clearly real and the cause of many different problems, but signs of the "end of the world" have actually been around since the beginning. The Roman empire collapsing was clearly one, as were both World Wars.

"Civilization" never collapsed entirely.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Unless you are faced against Gandhi 🇮🇳☢️

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (3 children)

People have been predicting the end of the world for as long as there were people.

It'll happen eventually, people are too impatient.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Christians have been waiting for the second coming literally since Jesus left. People in the new testament speak about it as if it would happen in their lifetime, and any Evangelical you meet will tell you they're convinced it'll happen in theirs

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (18 children)

I knew a conspiracy theory nut who said that society is about three months away from collapse. As in, on any given date society was due to collapse in a few months.

First society was due to collapse due to cancer caused by COVID vaccines. Then it turned to "COVID vaccines cause sterilization and cancer, which will collapse society in a few years" and complete disregard to the prior time line. Then society was due to collapse due to a global war caused by Putin using nuclear weapons. Which turned to "Putin will invade [my country, which does not border Russia. Or any country that borders Russia, and so on].

The fun part was that each theory didn't over-ride the previous, but they somehow build on top of each other. The atom bomb didn't replace the vaccine cancer, they were both part of the same plan. He believed in many other world-ending conspiracy theories, so I think he, like, gradually added layer. There was a thing with 9/11 that was somehow related to a world ending event (Probably began as a "The US is going to atom bomb the middle east and start a world war") and a weird economic conspiracy theory about countries not having any assets that probably grew from the 2008 financial crisis.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (9 children)

Fully self driving cars. Turns out it's a lot harder than we thought to build a system that doesn't get confused by edge cases.

By the time they are widely legal most people will probably (hopefully) have realized how stupid car dependency is.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I blame Musk for getting people excited about Mars and self driving cars, in the days before we realized he's nothing but a lying, piece of shit nepo deuche.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Cellphone would give breast and brain cancer.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago

Turns out that non-ionizing radiation still doesn't ionize, and having new little radios on us is exactly as impactful as having the old little radios on us.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago

I remember a conspiracy theory that Sarah Palin wasn't actually pregnant and she was covering for her teenage daughter by flying from Texas to Alaska to pretend to give birth. This was buffeted by the fact her daughter was out of school for "mono" for 9 months prior to Sarah's birth. Everyone thought the conspiracy nuts were crazy until that daughter showed up pregnant to the photo shot of Sarah Palins new baby.

Oh, and there was the time it was going around that Epstein supplied Trump with an underage hooker and then his lawyer paid off the girl to keep quiet. Can you imagine? Epstein supplying people with underage girls? And Trumps lawyer paying them off to keep quiet? Note that when this came to light in October of 2015, both premises seemed completely absurd.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Bananas and bees were both supposed to be extinct by now. Yet here I am in my chair eating a banana while a bee keeps body-slamming the ceiling light directly above me.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The messaging on the "save the bees" was really poor. The honeybees are fine, but the big concern is all the thousands of species of wild bees that are at risk.

But all of that attention on honey bees has, some ecologists argue, overshadowed their native counterparts: the wild bees. They’re an incredible bunch, found in all sorts of colors and sizes, and they’re important pollinators, too — better, by some measures, than honey bees. On the whole, native bees are also at a much greater risk of extinction, in part, because of the proliferation of European honey bees.

https://www.vox.com/down-to-earth/2023/1/19/23552518/honey-bees-native-bees-decline

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (3 children)

The Cavendish banana would have never gone fully extinct, it would have just become too fragile to be commercially viable, as happened to the Gros Michel in the 1950s.

As for the Cavendish, Central America was able to greatly slow the advance of Panama Disease with fire. Lots and lots of fire. It's still taking down plantations and is still news when it crosses into another South American country.

But we have recently identified the specific gene in our cloned cultivars that makes them so vulnerable to Panama, so a cure may now be possible. But as it stands we're still, potentially, one failed quarantine in Asia away from needing to replace the Cavendish banana.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Oh yeah 2012. There was that stuff about the Mayan calendar and the end of the world. Totally forgot about that one.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (2 children)

A few years ago aliens were supposed to reveal themselves on July 18th and we were supposed to become part of a galactic federation.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Trump was suppose to be president 30 times already.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

On a lighter note there's all the retrofuturism predictions like us all using hot air balloons to get around or everyone using video phones for day to day communication.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

As someone who just had a video call while on the road, I’m struggling to believe that it’s actually real.

I used a pocket sized, battery powered, computer with a flat screen and wireless data transfer to have a real-time video call with someone. The computer has three cameras on the back and one on the front, which means that about 50% of the cameras I own are actually in that one computer. The data of the operating system and all the necessary files are not stored on magnetic tapes or disks. Instead, it’s using a technology based on nano-scale silicon structures. Actually, some of my data isn’t even stored on the computer. It allows me to access other, much larger, computers that store some of my files such as documents and photos. The tiny computer is also capable of receiving electricity “over the air”, but I wasn’t using that feature at the time. If I told all of this to someone in the 1970’s they would consider me a scifi author.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (6 children)

A prediction from 1900 that in the year 2000 everyone would use 'Footomobiles' for transportation. Honestly much preferrable to what actually happened.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (6 children)

The one about printing a huge amount of money causing runaway price increases seems like it ended up pretty true.

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