this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2025
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[–] [email protected] 1 points 25 minutes ago

Steve Nippel (in a certain dialect of Dutch this not so mysteriously means 'stiff nipple')

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 hours ago

Ghonna Reah.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 hours ago

That One Guy.

"Ugh why is That One Guy suddenly in all the porn? He really ruins it!"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

I'd go with something that has a little more class than most of the suggestions here. Something with a certain ring to it. Like... Biggus Dickus

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 hours ago

What's so funny about 'Biggus Dickus'?

I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 hours ago

A Hideo Kojima inspired porno, no doubt.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 hours ago

Ugot Badtaste

If you're watching me then you definitely do. Lol

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Probably: Ho Lee Fuk

I'm ethnic Chinese so that makes it even better

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

You may be thinking of Bam Ding Ow.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 28 minutes ago

I think they were referring to Wi To Lo.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 hours ago (3 children)

Standard rules. Middle name and the street you grew up on.

Alan Woodbine.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Johnson Street would be great for this… if I had one.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 hours ago

Francisco 22...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 hours ago

Jared 832N County. Sexy

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 hours ago

I would go through LinkedIn and pick a person at random, use their name with the exact same spelling and any alphabet soup they have behind their name

Jerry Thompson, Esq Mary Kowalski, F.A.C.S. Dr. Alan Carter, DDS, FACP

These are all fake btw. I mean they may not be but if they are it’s genuinely a coincidence. That would be so weird

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

Richard McGusherblaster

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

Probably something with "Bear“ and "small“ like BearySmalls or something idk I’m a short and very obese hetero guy - no one would wanna watch me besides a few FFAs whose preferences I cover.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Dave.

No last name, just Dave.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Too Many Pancakes.

Because I'm fat but flat.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 hours ago

Silky Johnson

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 hours ago

Busting balkaner

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

My last name is a gemstone that is already used by strippers/pornstars often so I would probably keep that as the second part of my name but come up with something funny and/or masculine sounding for the first part since I'm a straight guy and not a female stripper/porn star.

Fuck it ill go with Dick Diamond.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 hours ago (2 children)

Gives you a opportunity for great catch phrase:

"I'm as hard as a diamond" "Dont bite this diamond" "This diamond performs under intense heat and pressure"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 hours ago

I have used all of these and more accompanied by a goofy smirk. My girlfriends have not found it as funny as I have. Haha

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 hours ago

"Diamonds are forever" and "Diamonds are a woman's best friends" are interesting catch phrases too

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 hours ago

And I, Load Chodington, will be your arch nemesis and steal all your roles.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 hours ago

Id use my real first name but then disguise my identity by using johnson as a last name.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 hours ago

[Lester the Molester Cockenschtuff

Or maybe Pete Jonze ](https://clip.cafe/zack-miri-make-a-porno-2008/who-are-again-lester/)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 hours ago

Average Richard

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 hours ago

Nice Cockbra

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 hours ago

Roy Mustang. Always thought that guy was wasting his time in the military with a name like that

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 hours ago

Phil McRevis
Clyde Taurez
Dick Fitzwell
Haywood Jablome
Harry Ballzanya

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 hours ago

Dru Peacock

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 hours ago

Dragon Dong

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 hours ago

George Washington Lemon Fresca

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 hours ago

Curly McDick

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 hours ago

Diablito Diablo

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 hours ago

My wifes name is a little...'exotic', and she's accidentally had it mistaken for a stripper name before XD