this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2023
34 points (88.6% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26701 readers
2055 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics.


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
top 44 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm just really jaded about spending all my time working, and barely having time to spend with my family every year, except a few days around Christmas time. Our bullshit expectation of always working just doesn't work for me anymore.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

I once heard someone say that when they started a meditation practice, after a while “every moment is my moment”.

They said it made them feel like their entire life was theirs, no matter what they were doing.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

Why am I not content with my life? The content of my life.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

For me definitely money / not wanting to work. I'd just want to do my own stuff all day everyday. And I mean actually do it rather than just sit on youtube all day

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Same. I'm an engineer with a very small tech company; even though we're not FAANG, we sure act like it. I have stuff from so many hobbies just sitting collecting dust in a closet or a drawer because when I get done with work I only have enough energy to feed myself, look after the dog, and do the bare minimum to keep life going until tomorrow, then rinse and repeat.

I think the only thing that's saved me from total burnout is that my boss is a hardliner on WFH; we maintain a small office space for conferences and meetings, but we've been told in no uncertain terms there will be no return to office. That at least lets me take care of small chores like laundry and dishes and runs to the grocery store during the day.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Beware if you have any kidney problems, but creatine always helps me have more mental endurance.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

I really love my family and don't ever want to hurt them.

I just wish they could be happy without me around every day.

I miss having time for myself.

I also love other people and want to be with them as well.

I just feel chained.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty content but I'd be more content with more money. But the process of making more money can make me discontented.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I'm the same way. I'm happy with my life, overall, but of course there are improvements I could make. There is pleasure in achieving something long striven for, and there is displeasure in the striving. More money would achieve some of the things I want more quickly, but none are critical so the balance is better with a longer wait and lower stress.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Money. I hate how I have to choose between being home with my family or working so we have a home. I don't mind working to pay for my life choices but working 4 full time jobs between two people just to make ends meet is insane. We even make more than the average at each job. I don't waste money either I have no more fat to trim I work and sleep there's a few times I can wave at my kid or wife. If I'm ever left alone long enough I'll probably end up collapsing at this point

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

A session in a float tank is the most effective use of time I’ve ever found in terms of decompressing.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

I'm not good with people. I'm perpetually a loner on the internet. My coworkers have a tendency to keep me going but sometimes they don't get along and I'm at a loss for what to do with myself. Even though it's not my problem, I make it my own because I'm an evil narcissist. There is no place on this planet for an asshole weirdo like me.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Health scare currently got me down. Good odds it's fine, but the possibilities range from "nothing to worry about" to "easily treatable" to "unpleasantly treatable" all the way down to "terminal".

Just last week I was contentedly playing darts at the bar with a date!

Appreciate your health while you have it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Eh, it's probably nothing major dude. We're constantly worrying about stuff that almost never ends up happening.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Doctor said it's nothing to worry about, but follow up in six months. So that's a relief. 😅

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Glad to hear, thanks for the update!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

For the first time, I am content. It's honestly a wild feeling - less then a decade ago I was about a half step from homeless and an opioid user. Now I've successfully transitioned, gotten my dream job, and have a super cute fat kitty. And I just got a message from what seems like a genuinely decent guy who I'm meeting for coffee.

It's fucking wild. Every day I just appreciate all the small things so much. It's really made me refocus my goal to try to help people as much as I can now.

Rootin for yall. I hope everyone gets to feel this way.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Is there any way you can channel that desire to help into some kind of routine that puts you in contact with people needing help regularly?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

More money and a job that allows me to have a flexible working schedule. I hate having an 8-5 and I want more money to travel around

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I want more money and a job with consisten weekends off. My schedule’s all over the place right now and it’s wearing on me.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

Money and a partner

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

My unwillingness to knowingly hurt people. I think I would be happier doing my own thing, but would hurt or disappoint do many people by leaving them (my boyfriend, family, colleagues, friends....). So I'm just wasting my own life instead...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

The minecraft server is down :(

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Cost of housing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Money and a support system.

Money would mean less stress about bills, hobbies, healthier food. It would leave me time, energy and motivation for better habits.

Support system would give me people to enjoy those hobbies with. People to help when shit happens, more emotional security.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

I've found a job I'm happy with, a house that I feel good in, and a wife that is my most important source of joy. We have a few hobbies that keep us occupied, but I think we'd almost have too much time to kill if we weren't working at least a little bit and feeling productive in fields we value. I am incredibly lucky to be able to say all of that, and it leaves my health issues as my biggest obstacle to greater contentment. I have epilepsy which has led to a pretty restrictive lifestyle. No drinking, early bedtime every single night, HEAVY (and expensive) medications with terrible side effects, and just a bit of constant stress around the possibility of a bad seizure. Plus the increased risks of early onset dementia that I just have to wait for and know is likely coming. There's nothing we can do about any of it except try to stay distracted, but that's hard with so many medication alarms going off every day.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Me, I inherited some good money and it didn't make all my issues go away. I am no means rich but comfortable. It's weird to see how you think is shaped by your statue in life. I need to turn my focus on life from going from one paycheck to the next to planning for the future and what to do with this money.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

nothing 😎

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Government corruption and corporatism that lead to ANYTHING that is in my best interest being locked behind exceedingly impossible profit motives. Citizens United, first past the post, a two party system, capitalism, the CIA, the World Bank: they are all to blame for the life getting less and less enjoyable and more filled with work.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)
  • Need anything resembling a support system to make pulling myself out of an abusive clusterfuck even seem worth it.

  • Can't socialize til I've already clawed my way of it all by myself, because I'm too far behind anyone who isn't still in high school and it makes people closer to my own age uncomfortable.

So I don't get to have emotional support of any kind. But I do get to be judged when I fail. I'd rather not die if I didn't have to, tbh, but I am kinda being pushed there for lack of other options. Anyway, how is your day.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

If you’re a man, there a men’s groups for this sort of thing: the loneliness, the hopelessness, the being aware that abuse is wrong but somehow not feeling enough impulse to leave, all of it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

solid wage, perhaps if AI would stop attacking every ability to earn a solid wage in the future...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

My inability to experience joy and save it to my long term memory.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

You have to juggle far too many things to be successful and it just makes me so anxious that I can't juggle just one thing.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

I guess you’ll never be content then

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Probably the chronic debilitating disease I have that saps my energy and concentration and massively limits what I can do. Other than that, things are honestly pretty good.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

The fact that I’m alive, and contentedness is a state lasting approximately 10 seconds.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Other people.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I'd like to move my new family from Korea to Sweden because I think life there for our two children from middle school upwards would be much easier. But for that my fiance woul need to give up her well payed job here and her daughter couldn't meet her dad so easily.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

More money would be the biggest help. Which always makes me think my life overall is good right now since there aren't any personal problems that couldn't be fixed with money. Relationships and health are good, and always I feel so lucky to be alive and physically embodied. Just always feeling behind and stressed because living costs more than I can make.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Stupid college classes that don't even count as actual academic work.