Ask Lemmy

overcompensating by being a mean B, especially the overweight ones. i had to work with one on more than one occasion, one as a lab partner, and 1 as a coworker. the lab partner was worst.

I disagree with the premise. For the most part, people don’t buy nice things to compensate for something - they do it to signal status.

Also, as asexual male, I always find it amusing when someone implies I'm compensating for a small dick with my truck, as if my dick size was in any way relevant to how I live my life.

I think this is a pretty dumb topic, because it really involves a lot of stereotyping and bullshit (like the other comment suggesting that fancy cars aren't linked to penis size anxiety) but anyway...

If we take "penis size" as a metric that men believe is important to their sexual attractiveness, and the assumption that they buy expensive cars to compensate, then we could see the goal as increasing their diminished sexual value in an alternative way. A rich man with a small penis may (in this silly logic) be as sexually attractive as a poor man with a large penis.

So for women, what is a stereotypical number that they could worry about and try and compensate for? The two that spring to mind (in this clichéd view of the sexual economy) are age and weight. Weight feels different, as there are methods of managing it that are more effective than "this secret ancient method will grow your dong 3 inches!" but for many people it is not an easily controlled factor. Age is, chronologically at least, a one way street. For both of these, make-up and grooming are pretty effective at reducing the "negatives" (bleurgh!) of being old / overweight, but that would be the equivalent of men stuffing socks and salami down their pants. What is the equivalent of "I'm not conventionally sexually attractive, but I have other redeeming qualities, like a willingness to waste money trying to impress women"? I wonder if it's "being kinda slutty"?

When I think of the equivalent to the cliché of the needy middle-aged businessman in his sports car, I think of the stereotype of the middle-aged, overweight, divorcée wearing too much makeup and dressing too young/slutty. She's not really trying to pretend she's young and hot, she's visibly demonstrating that's she's willing to make an effort to attract a man "if I'm willing to look like this in public, think how much of an effort I'll make on the sack!"

But I think this is a pretty silly topic, and making stereotyped judgements about other people is pretty bad. The "facists have small dicks" memes that kick about are kinda funny, but are really just reinforcing a body image problem that exists much more in society and the minds of men than it does in the tastes of their actual sexual partners. And women can be whatever age, weight or whatever else they want, and dress how they like. Some people just love leopard print! No need to project society's ills onto them!

I think assuming men need to compensate for a body parts appearance they can't influence is a pretty idiotic thing.

Wearing/buying luxury fashion goods.

Plastic surgery and implants

Like someone buying expensive cars to compensate for their smaller dick.

Just so you know, there's some evidence this isn't actually a thing and that the people who do that kind of thing are actually very self-assured in their penis size. Now, that doesn't mean they have a large penis, it just means they are happy with it and unconcerned with how others feel about it. Which, if you think about it, tracks. Because the guys who drive wanker sports cars or giant fucking trucks usually don't give a shit if their partner feels good, only if they do. So the size of their dick is kind of irrelevant to the whole equation. They could have a tiny dick, they could have a giant dick, either way, they're perfectly fine with it because it's not about how anyone else feels, it's about them getting off and being in control.

Might take me a while but I'll try to dig up the old /r/science reddit thread about it.

I love the way you participate in toxic masculinity.

I believe they measure the vaginal folds

by being extra attitude problem.

Women might feel the need to "compensate" for their faces and overall bodies but there's no dick equivalent. A flat chested cutie will still be many people's cup of tea, but no one prefers a micropenis. I'm not sure the people who buy the big American trucks have small penises necessarily, they might just be overall insecure and need a very visible sign of status.

no bewbs

Tighter jeans

Makeup.