this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
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How much time have you spent being single?

If you're currently single: is it by choice or circumstance?

Do you / did you enjoy single life?

What are / were the pros and cons?

Is / was partnership a goal of yours?

If you're currently not single: Did your goals change after getting into a relationship?

What are the pros and cons?

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Outside of my prepubescent years, I spent roughly 4.5 years being "Single". I did have some partners here and there but never rose to a full relationship. I was simply a bit of a wreck after a bad relationship ended and destroyed my trust.

Ultimately, I'm a companion orientated person and a bit of a romantic. Being single isn't the end of the world for me but I miss casual touch and someone to do things with. I make due and am generally happy and haven't really been in the market searching for about 1.5 years now.

The pros of being single: free time, make plans with whomever, low drama, quiet life.

Cons: free time, lack of general intimacy, lack of hobby sharing, and doing things as I am companion oriented

My partnership goal would be to find someone who has some hobby interests that align with mine and likes the quiet life. At this point I won't be having kids and marriage doesn't feel all that important. I don't need a document to agree to be with someone. I'd just want a place out in a rural area where we can enjoy quiet living, gardening, tinkering, and evenings with fires, jokes and the occasional hosting of people to hang out.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

I'm going to be an outlier here, since I got a boyfriend at 16 I was single for about 6 months. I dated that boyfriend for 6 years, spent some time single and then started dating my now husband. We were friends before I broke up with my ex, the breakup wasn't related at all.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

So far, over 50 years and counting. I've always been single.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Long enough to accept it. Lots of reasons that ultimately add up to being an inadequate person, but also no transportation/income in a semi-rural area (also health/personality issues) so I'm a shut-in and thus don't ever meet people. That said, even in school/college it's not like I ever really made strong connections with people, romantic or otherwise. Non-religious in USA (esp. given rural) certainly doesn't (and more so didn't) help with a dating pool either.

And even if none of those were issues, I'm just not that interesting. I suspect the people who might like to be around me are probably also in their house more-often-than-not, and not within any distance/likelihood of meeting.

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