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Do those really work though or do they take the edge off feeling absolute despair all the time?
Everyone’s different and some medications work better for one person than another. I can’t speak for OP, nor can I suggest that your experience would be the same as mine, but finding an antidepressant that works was a game changer for me.
It helps keep the “doom” thoughts from spinning in my head. That is, I can hear or read about something bad, but it won’t keep coming back to haunt me throughout the day. Ever lie down to sleep, but instead find your mind awake for hours with worries and anxieties? My antidepressant prevents that.
An interesting side-effect is that it also keeps songs from getting stuck in my head. Again, YMMV, but note that it does take time (usually at least 2 weeks, maybe more) for the full effects to kick in.