this post was submitted on 22 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Those I share a space with typically conflict with each other, it's not like school where they would go at me, so I tend to not be in the know. The only exception is one tried getting back at the others by using me as a bargaining chip. As in he kept me at his house for 2 days.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I mean, I was all, ok juicy work drama, juicy work drama. Then I got to the last sentence, I think that goes beyond work drama.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I checked out at "it's not like school" but you got me to go back and read, yikes

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (2 children)

That moment when I'm disqualified from a venting question for going over the meter.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It’s actually a pretty serious problem. It’s not so much that you’re disqualified, as that you’re ineffective at being heard.

This is a serious problem. Have you considered listening to great speeches, or rap, or poetry?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Not in particular, no. In what way are you suggesting I'd use that?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Listen to lots and lots of them. Absorb their patterns, to adopt those patterns, to improve your own communication.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Oh, that. I've tried that with other things. I'm finding it difficult, perhaps it's my mind going a different way.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You two said it was "beyond work drama" and came across like it was unfitting as a result. Are we only expected to describe events that go below a certain glass ceiling of conflict?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

came across like it was unfitting as a result.

That was all you. We neither said nor implied any such thing.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The first comment you replied to contrasted things that seemed "beyond work drama" with the "juicy work drama" they were looking for.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

And that isn't supposed to send the message some of you think it's unfitting?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"What you just said goes way beyond the original topic" does not at all imply "shut the fuck up about it". That's an implication you created out of your own subconscious biases.

The discussion we're having right now has strayed pretty far from the original topic, but I'm not disapproving of it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I never said it implied "shut up" if that's where the confusion comes from.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

disqualified from a venting question

That means "shut up".

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

As in he kept me at his house for 2 days.

Would you care to elaborate?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (2 children)

That's basically it. I was the closest thing that could be used against the others, which was out of spite. Only was solved due to passerbies who knew something was going on and where.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

....we're you kidnapped or something?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Do you sometimes feel like people don’t take you seriously, even when you say very serious things?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Often, but in what way does that connect?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I feel my mind turning off, turning to teflon, when I read your comment. It made me wonder whether others have that experience too.

Here’s something interesting: social scientists have found that humans’ eyebrows dance when they talk to each other. The eyebrow dance is normally not consciously perceived, but it is synchronized between two individuals when they speak to one another.

What’s more is the eyebrow dance is literally a dance, not a conversation, specifically in the way it is timed. It is perfectly in sync, not offset as you’d expect a back-and-forth response pattern to be.

When this eyebrow dance synchronization is inhibited, for example by covering the speaker’s eyebrows, that speaker has an incredibly hard time getting information across.

This is a long-documented phenomenon in human culture: that people can be standing there conveying information and others can be hearing it but not picking it up.

Like one person can be saying “Our car crashed! My brother is badly hurt and he needs an ambulance! Can I use your phone?” and for various reasons another person can just stand there not processing any of it.

So really what I’m trying to say is that human communication is finicky and relies on maintenance of non-obvious parallel channels, and people can get cut off from others when those channels break down.

From reading your writing, and seeing how others respond, it makes me think there might be some channel based on word sequencing that’s not being adhered to.

I know from experience how much it sucks to be cut off and unseen, so I thought I’d point out for you that while I recognize what you’re saying is important, it doesn’t land in my feelings for some reason, and it feels related to how things are worded.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Does this eyebrow dance apply to neurodivergent individuals as well? I gather I wouldn't know if it's not consciously observed, but the feeling of eyebrow movement feels slightly alien to my muscle memory.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago

I don’t know whether they studied neurodivergent people or not, but from what I heard my hunch is no. They just treated the study pool as one distribution.

If I had to bet, I would bet that neurodivergent people’s eyebrow dances are disrupted, given how hard it is for ND people to be heard now matter how much sense they make.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I genuinely can't tell if you're an elaborate troll, LLM, or just autistic.

I don't mean any of those as an insult, just to say that you have a very distinct prose that really comes through when you write more than a sentence, or two.

Given your post history, I'm leaning towards LLM, but I'm open to being wrong.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Is there any mechanism why which you could differentiate between these three, that can’t be fulfilled by reading my post history?

I am aware that I have a style. I’m proud to say that it’s a result of my trying not to.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Probably, but none that I'd actually invest my own time and effort into. I was just making an offhand observation, not starting an investigation.

The furthest I might be willing to go, would be to provide some constructive criticism, but I'd even have to mull that over i.e. weigh the risk I'm just helping fine-tune a LLM model, for free...so...yeah...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Wait, you were held against your will in a house by a coworker??

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Please tell me you're the office cat or something.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago