Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected]
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected].
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
I double check. If I think that I'm right about something, I take a moment to consider "have I actually double checked this to make sure it's true? If not could I potentially humiliate myself by saying something verifiably false, or could I potentially spread misinformation? If I haven't checked, then I take the time to look into it first before trying to talk about it or make any claims about it. I try not to go based entirely off assumptions or gut feelings. If it turns out I was wrong, then I've learned something and avoided a mistake, if it turns out I'm right, then at least now I know for sure that I really am right. It also helps to get into the habit of actually thinking about what I'm going to say, whether it's actually right or not or just feels right without anything to back it up, and to be open to being wrong. I try to see the possibility of being wrong as a potential learning experience, which makes it less scary, and also makes it easier to not cling to the desire to be right all the time.
Yeah, I also tend to log everything that is supporting my argument. But, it definitely feels like it could be worse "gathering evidence" sometimes. Especially if the topic is around self-improvement rather than something objective.
If the topic isn't objective then I try to keep in mind that just because something makes me uncomfortable or I disagree with it, that doesn't automatically make it wrong or me right. I have to contemplate why I disagree and whether it's something that actually affects me or just something that rubs me the wrong way for no good reason. And if something does bother me, is it productive in any way to make that known to others or should I just keep that to myself? And even if it bothers me, does that mean other people should be bothered by it too? If yes, then why? Is it a morality thing, or just a personal preference thing? Then even if it is a morality thing, I don't have to try to make it an argument or a fight, instead I can just try to get my own views across and explain my reasoning for the other person to make of what they will. Doesn't mean I never get mad or into fights, but I try to usually just give the energy I get.