Saw a comic recently about this topic and got me thinking. I know what "the talk" is about since it appears in so many media but I don't ever recall having such an experience personally. Did you? What was it like?
I was a late 80s kid, just for context. As far as my experience goes, my parents were very open about sex as a natural process for reproduction. They answered openly any questions I had whenever I had them, keeping to the bare minimum necessary but never avoiding the topic- also never using metaphors as a substitute for plain facts ie. "the birds and the bees".
So at about age 5 or so I was already aware about how reproduction worked on animals, us humans included. As I kept growing up of course I kept connecting the dots on any social aspects of sex and relationships (ie that is supposed to be pleasant, that people do it even if they're not planning to have babies, etc) but I never had a moment of shocking realization regarding sex. I often found it stupid how some of my classmates would giggle or lower their voice when talking about anything sexual like, well, like it's a taboo. And I was often disappointed at how much of what my classmates knew wasn't exactly true, which at the time I chalked to their stupidity, although obviously it wasn't their fault. They were misinformed.
By the time kids got to sex ed in highschool they already had their facts pretty much right though, fortunately.
So I'm curious about your experiences about this while growing up. Was yours similar to mine or did you sit through some awkward conversations? How did you feel about it all?
When I was a pre-teen I asked my mom about it because I'd been playing The Sims 2 and figured out that your sims can woohoo or they can try for baby, and both look like the same thing. And of course 1 sim day after the lullaby jingle plays upon woohooing the female sim enters the first trimester, and 3 sim days later you have a new baby sim in the family. She was very factual about it all, but didn't bother to talk at all about anything other than explaining vaginal sex. I had to piece the rest together from what I learned at school.
Fortunately I had fairly decent sex ed, except it was painfully boring and felt no different talking about human reproduction than when in highschool biology we talked about how plants reproduce (complete with extremely vague heavily photocopier-burned diagrams of anatomy that look almost entirely unlike what it's depicting which we had to label) but they at least discussed condoms and birth control pills, and even demonstrated a condom on a wooden phalis when I was in high school so that's a lot more than I'm sure some kids get
For my own kids, my oldest is 5 and has already asked. I've left it extremely scientific because she's way too young for a proper talk in just explaining that a male secretes sperm that fertilizes an egg which eventually forms a baby. She wanted more detail but I had to leave that at "when you're older". I'll probably have to give an updated talk when she's 7 or 8 to make sure she knows about periods and maybe I'll then go into more detail so she can be armed with knowledge should any boys take an interest in her (and statistically many boys have watched porn by age 10 which is terrifying)
25% of Canadians are no longer virgins by 12, which means that 12 is too late to start discussing it for 25% of the audience.
I started talking to my kids about it when they were about 5, and made it a policy to answer any question they asked at the level of detail they asked, with the exception of personal details in my own sex life. I think it worked out pretty well, even if it wasn't exactly comfortable. Did have to say to one of my now-married kids that I'm happy they have a healthy sex life, but I'd prefer the sex paraphernalia not be left in the common areas when we stop by.