this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
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Dad Jokes

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Most humans don't have any giraffes in their necks at all!

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 2 weeks ago

Sigh... Have my vote

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

A slightly related, but true, biology fact is that all mammals (with the exception of sloths and manatees) have seven neck vertebrae. So, humans and giraffes actually have the same number of bones in their necks.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, I've heard that--in fact, I made the joke largely because I expect lots of people to mentally start saying, "well actually..." before getting to the punchline.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Tangentially related. If you have two legs, you have slightly more than the average number of legs people have.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

In other words, most people have an above-average number of legs.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Also, the average human has less than one testicle

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

I think I have one that's continually headbutting my spine.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Having seen a giraffe use its neck as a whip, yeah, it would make some sense on the surface. Pretty flexible and strong, as if their massive kicks weren't already enough of a deterrent.

Still, neatto. A joke my wife would definitely glare at.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Except Gary "Giraffe Neck" Maher who has twenty giraffes in his neck and only 2 vertebrae.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You know we don't count Gary. Not after last time.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wasn't there. Can you retell the story?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Sorry, I can't retell it. Not after last time.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

On average, humans have less than two feet

Edit: oh so I just barged in here and said the basically same thing the other guy said. Sorry