Ask Lemmy

When I truly internalized that I don't have to prove my worth to anyone, even if I don't always know what I'm doing.

Looking back, that sense of self-worth and confidence is what I probably saw in all of the adults around me that made them seem so incredible as a child.

So when I felt that, I thought "huh, so this is what being an adult feels like."

I got towels, cast iron pans, and a new knife for Christmas and couldn't have been happier.

I'm still a bed by the wall person though. when me and my partner get a house that will probably change, but for now I like having a corner to sit up against.

You pass by a business with an "Established X" sign; where X is any year past your high-school graduation year.

Having the opportunity to buy cake whenever you want, having enough money to buy cake whenever you want, and choosing to not buy cake whenever you want.

You are done with the wonders and joys of life, and just want to work the rest away until you are dead.

When people offer you opportunities, you reject them, knowing full well you can't afford such attempts.

Safety is all that matters.

I was in my late 20s and two of my uncle was having a heated argument over politics. Everyone else was quiet, afraid to say anything. I spoke out in a normal tone, not raising my voice, "that's enough". They stopped immediately. It was fairly surreal.

You start saving boxes. You think, this looks like a good box.

You find yourself compulsively drawn to woodworking.

You find yourself in a hardware or furniture store and everything looks cool.

"Its a great day to hang out clothes"

I still have mine against the side because of space issues. I like my open space, especially since I have lived in a couple of rooms where having the bed against the wall gave me extra floor space to move around.

But to answer the question, various things have definitely made me feel it. Though I'm definitely gonna say the stereotypical "All Kids Are Annoying" as my answer. Definitely how I've felt for years, despite not even being that old.

I was recently on a public bus that ended up stopping at a stop by the local museum and because of a youth ride free program, what looked like a whole class of elementary school kids got on the bus. They were loud and annoying and wouldn't shut up. Thankfully I had my headphones so I could listen to music to try and ignore them to the best of my abilities. 0/10, would not recommend.

Similar things happen when I get in around the time highschool gets out, but at least the teens have the ability to shut up and use their inside voices on a public bus. So they at least get a pass for not being super loud and obnoxious.

I'm choosing a light fixture right now and I'm trying to decide which one looks best with all the natural fibers I plan to place in the same room, and the fact that I'm choosing to spend real hours on this self-created homework when I could instead be playing video games should tell you all you need to know.

Your body starts betraying you.

More specific to becoming a middle aged man, I started finding any sport enjoyable regardless of what it was. Additionally I started listening to history podcasts. Not sure these are gendered activities but there is definitely a stereotype that men start getting more involved in sport and history.

Being jealous of other people's wooden floors

Finding joy in having a clean kitchen

Being excited for a dump truck of free mulch

When throwing away a perfectly good box is a well thought out decision after the box has been in a staging area for some time while you think about it.

How does that means that you're an adult? You arrange furniture based on a lot of factors.

Being around kids and being seen just like I remember seeing adults when I was little. Assumed authority and decision making power and the answer to every problem or wish.

Being able to just go and buy coconut bread without having to ask my parents and them telling me: "Only if you put it on your bread"