Last panel is wrong. Genie would just grant him an MBA from a top tier school
this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2023
1508 points (98.9% liked)
Memes
45660 readers
1156 users here now
Rules:
- Be civil and nice.
- Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
I once looked through a textbook from my friend's MBA course. The first thing I noticed was in a highlighted box in the chapter on business negotiating: "Your skill at negotiating will affect the outcome of the negotiations."
These are the people that make 10X what I make.
This is why I refuse to get an MBA. I already know my pants go on my legs. Thanks.
taking notes On the legs, you say? Interesting..🤔
Your skill at putting on your pants will affect the outcome of the pants-on-putting operation.
In Czech we say MBA means Mladý, Blbý, Arogantní - Young, Dumb, Arrogant.
load more comments
(5 replies)
Are you sure that wasn’t the introduction to the Speech skill in Skyrim?
I learned this in my first statics class, and I have a BS in business administration.
Statics? They teaching yall physics?
Not spelling though... they skipped right past that.
They gave you some bs alright.
It would be funnier if the genie says "there are two rules"
Japanese companies, this isn't a wish, it's a fundamental truth of the universe. Like gravity. No matter the scale or importance of them. I promise you your car exists because of an Excel 2003 file on some underpaid engineer's laptop that they periodically sync with an inventory system.
I once worked for a Japanese company where I had to make a presentation. In Excel, I shit you not. Then we had one of our "shadow" managers make a Japanese translation of the same thing. It took me two days to get the kerning and print layout right, especially with that weird english typeface that is Japanese standard, I hate to think how long the translator took to get their version right.
load more comments
(2 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Microsoft spent years and years trying to get people to not use Excel as a database, until they eventually had to give up hope that anyone who doesn't know the difference would voluntarily use Access, so they started adding database-like functionality to Excel to meet their customer's demands and try to make the experience at least a little bit less painful.
This is a real-life case of "meet the user where they are" despite the designer's wishes, because even within Microsoft, there is strong agreement on not using Excel as a DB.
I only ever encountered Access was once many years ago and I was warned that it had issues with multiple users.
Well, to be fair to Access, it's not like Excel is such a great multi-user database either, now is it? ;-)
load more comments
(4 replies)
load more comments
(5 replies)
This is basically what I run for a living and it's definitely not glamorous.
Employers get what they demand, what they deserve. Anyway excel works as a database until around 1 million entries...
Once you get to a million just start a new one and create a "master" spreadsheet that uses power query to append them all. Problem solved ;)
Don't tell anyone but I actually do this.
I feel you. Working in healthcare, ms office is the only thing consistently installed site wide I can take advantage of to run a db.
load more comments
(2 replies)
I work as a network tech for a globally spanning ISP specializing in fiber services, handling major maintenances that are service effecting for business and government customers (SLAs are in effect). These maintenances are planned and tracked through various excel sheets - housed either in a shared network drive (so yeah, we may run into issues where multiple people are trying to edit the same doc at once), or excel tables in a SharePoint.
Prior to the merger of companies I recently went through, we had actual database systems to track this stuff that worked just fine. And now we're relying on the same shit a grad student would use to track their doctorate progress. It'll work until it doesn't. Looking forward to the shit-show if it gets me overtime.
Anyone else use Microsoft Access....30 years ago?
How about last week?
Why yes this comic made me think of our users, why do you ask?
Fun fact: most of the electronic voting machines in the 2000 presidential election used Access to store vote counts. Access, the "database" with a user-editable audit table.
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
3gb CSV file goes brrrr....
Should’ve been the version saying:
Geanie: “It is done”
Person: “But… nothing changed”
G: “Correct”
"I have to make a brochure for the printing shop and I'd like to compose it in Excel"
"There are actually five rules..."
"In Powerpoint?"
"Make that six."
Except PowerPoint is actually quite nice to make quick, easy and good looking visualizations and brochures without having to deal with Word
load more comments
(2 replies)
Don't be gross, use CSV files
I mean it's a simple file format so it'll perform better because it doesn't have to decode any complex formats or protocols.
Big O? Never heard of it!
load more comments
(1 replies)
My 5th rule would be "no 'fix my IT problem without me telling you what the error message says'". Because fuck that
Error 0x2e8da08150469
Isn't the Genie usually depicted as malicious, or at least mischievous? I would expect the Genie to grant the wish, knowing what a shitshow it would be.
Even Genie have standards.
Honestly, since the introduction of 'tables', pivot tables, Power Pivot and Power Query, Excel is way more viable to be used as a database. Tables in particular mean that formulas fill down and the range automically resizes when records are added.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Kind of related question: Is it okay for me to use JSON as a small DB? I just store basic blog page data there.
I mean it will work, but for a blog I'd store the pages in markdown files, to make it easier to edit. For context, look into how Hugo works
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(5 replies)
view more: next ›