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It's not a simple task, so I won't list many specifics, but more general principles.
First, some specifics:
Generally:
You mentioned using cloud flare, which is good. You might also consider configuring your firewall to disallow outbound connections to your local network. That way if your server gets owned, they can't poke other things on your network.
Not sure if it's always possible but I setup an auth portal via port 443 where I'm using authelia and fail2ban, and using traefik to route authenticated users to other ports from there. So for example Plex 32400 is not exposed, only 443. But you get there via 443 and authentication.
Yup, that's a really good pattern to follow. Not only does it minimize your exposure behind a secured entry, it also makes sure that all of your access is uniformly authenticated.
You have to do some shenanigans to do something similar with other, non-http based services, but it's possible with most of them.
Does that still allow other Plex users the ability to play remotely without having to use Plex relay?