this post was submitted on 24 Feb 2024
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I'm the dumb one but I make her laugh.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

My SO was traumatized by her religious upbringing. The effects of purity culture have left significant scars that make it practically impossible to be physically intimate. Short kisses, holding hands, and hugging are okay but any amount of nudity is over the line. She wants to be intimate and has been working with a therapist to get there but obvious markers of success aren't there yet. I knew all of this going in to our relationship or learned them pretty early.

Intentionally helping someone to heal from trauma in a relationship is an appealing concept to me. Being in a romantic relationship with someone I can't be physically intimate with has some unique problems beyond the problems I had as a single person but on balance out relationship is really good. We're forced to have really good communication fundamentals so we don't hurt each other with our conflicting needs. That helps us with tons of aspects of our relationship.

By far this is the most comfortable, enriching, and benefitial romantic relationships I've been in.