this post was submitted on 28 Jan 2024
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When he says normalize, he’s not saying it is something that people should seek out. In case that was somehow taken that way.
The problem is there is immense social pressure, especially against women, to never have a divorce. It is seen as a failure, whereas sometimes it is simply the result of circumstances beyond our control or is just something one person, or maybe both, need in their lives.
I am happily married. Like many people we have had our ups and downs. Every couple should do everything they can to repair their relationship and make it work. But sometimes it’s just not enough. Sometimes you weren’t supposed to be together, sometimes one person has some issue that they just will never resolve, sometimes you find out things about your partner or things emerged down the line. We are not prescient, things change. So people should feel very comfortable divorcing without all of the social baggage that comes with it. Because divorce is inevitable, it is never going to go away. And it is a viable decision for one to make.
As for marriage, you don’t have to participate and to say you just want it to go away is kind of ridiculous because we both know that is not going to happen. So we deal with reality and accept that divorce is part of the marriage landscape.