this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2023
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Both beliefs are fine, but please realize the hypocrisy (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

I'm Cave Johnson, here to personally thank you for volunteering to test Aperture Science's brand new long range spacetime displacement device. Before we begin, there's 2 things I need to mention.

First off, there is a non-zero percent, closer to 90, chance that you will end up being a just a random arrangement of atoms after the test. Not in a philosophical way. Just an absolutely random heap of atoms sprawled across the testing chamber floor.

Second, I need to remind you that the waiver you signed is iron clad. You can thank the suits in legal for that.

Now let's begin!