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No, i started focusing on the things they did well, instead of focusing on the negative. It's quite easy to only see which behavior is not acceptable and focus on that. But if kids do something positive, it's easy to take it for granted, instead of for instance complimenting them. In other words, my perspective changed.
If i look at my parents; they were always punishing me and if i behaved in a way they liked, they would say nothing, because that is the way i had to be. So, in their eyes it was normal to behave and that did not need to be complimented. So, their focus was exclusively on punishment, no rewards.
Hope this makes a bit more sense (not a native speaker either)
Thanks that makes a lot more sense. I try to strike a balance, but focusing on the positive sounds gold. I'll give it a try.