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30M After divorce I got literally zero support from anyone, why? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I got divorced like 5 months ago after a 9 years with this girl who cheated on me, emotionally abused me, etc etc

I've been suicidal since the split, getting worse by the day still, and literally nobody ever asked if I was OK, aside from my mom. Even when I begged close friends for support they basically just ghosted me. My ex is surrounded by support, from the same people who I thought were my best friends.

Do I just have shitty people around me or is this just what guys deal with? The attitude towards me is just "get over it". I've lost almost everyone I'm close to because of this and I'm starting to think there might actually be one viable option of getting over it because existing is simply torture. All of 2025 felt like just a bad dream but it's unfortunately real.

Edit: Yes I have a counselor - a very good one I see weekly.

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[–] [email protected] 61 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Yep.

Everyone in my life was done hearing about my divorce LONG before I was ready to stop talking about it. But, I just had to shut up and carry on, or risk driving them away.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I resonate with this a lot. I wished I stopped talking about it with certain people sooner.

I don't blame them, some people have enough shit they are dealing with and they simply don't know what to say.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago

I do think that this is partly what therapy is useful for, talking about something you’re not done with yet

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

This happened to me with a good friend. He wanted to stop listening, and admittedly I was on repeat (severe depression, major life changes coming and I couldn't cope properly) - but it has the effect of drifting us pretty severely.