this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2025
14 points (76.9% liked)

Ask Lemmy

31114 readers
2187 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected] or [email protected]


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

For starters, I'm a 20-year-old man. My family is very Christian, so I am traditional and I have never met a gay family member. If it was, and I'm sure it was, it was never talked about.

Well, when I was 15, I met Greg, the same guy who made me realize I was bisexual when he introduced me to be my boyfriend.

Because of my internalized homophobia, this relationship is over. I have had and still have many mental problems that make me feel bad. I was mean to others, I pushed them away. I would get attached to them and then I would find out that they are bad.

Greg was one of my attachments. Now that I'm 20, I'm attached to him again, but I've been very rude to him, so I'm sure he doesn't like me, even though he used to have feelings for me. I told him I hated him, I pushed him, shouted at him. Am I a bad person? :(

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

You are in a very messy, very confusing stage of life. You will make many, MANY mistakes and piss some people off. I'm twenty-26, and I still make mistakes.

You'll start to understand what makes you who you want to be, and stop listening to all you've been told. You rebuild yourself out of your life experiences. Constantly. Forever.

You're human. Not perfect. None are. What matters is what you do next.

As was said above, no one who questions their actions or who admits their need for mental health support is all bad. It's the people who strategically, purposefully manipulate people with no regard for their well-being who are bad. The people who pathologically lie, cheat, steal, and remorselessly exploit others who are bad.

If you have the means, get assessed. Take no diagnoses from the Internet or people on message boards.

If you have the means, apologize, and commit yourself to treating Greg better or even neutrally. He doesn't have to accept your apology. You have to make your peace with that. Also, he introduced you as a "boyfriend." You had a reaction to that. You're allowed. Again, it's all about what you do next.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I am OP, the translator is wrong. It’s supposed to say “introduced me to who would become my boyfriend”

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

Ah. Ok. Well, the rest stands. And, hopefully, you're able to smooth things with Greg.