Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected].
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected] or [email protected]
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
Look at straight people and act like them? I'm not really sure what to respond. But I know several people who don't really stand out. And I mean it's not like we talk about sex and partners all the time on the street or at work. So unless you wear an outrageous dress or have a crazy wig, or tell me... I won't really notice if you're queer, or if you have different sexual preferences than me. (I'm not really sure if we're talking about outer appearance here, or every day situations like going to the supermarket, or hiding your true self from close friends and relatives...) I mean generally it helps not to act too extroverted if you want to blend in, because being loud will get you attention.
I was going to say how would I be able to tell your sexual orientation?? Just act normal. Its only a bit more obvious when someone has a more flamboyant affliction to their speech or dress with a clear label on their clothes that they are LGBT+
True. Though I think the speech thing is some stereotype, and educated people should avoid doing that. I know the average person immediately jumps to conclusions if you talk a certain way... But I've learned early on in my teens that this isn't a reliable way to tell apart gay people from straight people... But I agree with what's being said here. If you want to avoid being labeled, don't talk in a "gay" way and don't be overly nice to people as a man. Or be empathetic or whatever good traits you might have... But that's all more stereotypes for gay men. Out of all the possibilities of being LGBTQ+
(And people get labeled anyways. I also get asked, predominantly by children, why I have long hair. So the stereotypes start with very simple things. I still don't know how to react to that. Should I tell them I'm just a nerd and computer programmer, and that's the stereotype they should internalize? (Edit: I'm a bit sarcastic... I usually tell them everyone can have their hair however they like.))
It is common enough to be a recognizable trend even if it is not 100% accurate. That is how it ended up a stereotype.
The only problem is when someone assumes it is always true.
I agree with the speech thing and apologize. There are just same people that are very flamboyant where I live because they are proud and should be.
As I have said before, I dont think I would be able to tell. Theres nothing to do to blend in if you're just yourself 🤷♀️
By the way: I don't think you were wrong before... That's the stereotype. I think it's a valid thing to discuss, so no need to apologize. It's stupid, but it's definitely out there. And I guess it's different at different places of the world anyways. And in different age groups etc. I still don't know what OP is talking about... I mean I kind of think those details and the context matter to answer an exact question.
And I've also met all kinds of different people... Extroverted, flamboyent, introverted, people who like to talk about themselves or people who prefer to keep that private. I think I agree, with most people and in every day situations, there is just no way of telling who they are or what they like.
It's a real thing though
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_male_speech
Sure. I didn't want to say it's not a stereotype or not some real dynamics behind that. It's just unreliable. Thanks for the link btw, I didn't knew these studies with numbers existed. If I'm super bored, I'm gonna read some of that. But the first study is wild in the abstract already, mentioning homosexuality in one sentence with another word that we don't longer deem acceptable to mention in the same context... Guess the world has changed a bit since 1994. But there are newer studies linked as well...
The speech thing definitely but long hair nowadays no don't think so. I mean the man bun is a thing.
The only way I knew my coworker was a lesbian was because she told me about her wife. Literally just be a normal human, and no one will think either way.