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What was the first thing you ever stole? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

79 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I am not advocating shoplifting, but we all did something dumb as a kid. What is your story?

Me, I was 2 years old and at Tim Hortons with my mother and a family friend. This was almost 50 years ago and Tim Hortons still had servers back then, so there was a cutout in the counter for them to go in and out. The donuts are in racks behind the counter. I had had a chocolate donut paid for by my mother, and apparently I decided I wanted another, and I was so little I nipped behind the counter when nobody was there, helped myself to another, and was only discovered when my mother noticed me polishing off a different donut. She did pay for it and everyone laughed, I was just little and it was funny. Sadly the quality of Tim Hortons donuts has gone way downhill over the intervening years, as older Canadians know.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

The first thing was probably a set of earrings when I was a really little guy. I handed them to my mom when we got home and she was shocked at what a smooth swipe I pulled and we immediately went back to return them. So much for my thoughtful gift! Hahaha.

I also recall this thing at my very conserva-religious elementary school, where people set up a little market selling things as gifts and such. I was given some money to go buy presents for people, but nobody told me how to pay for anything, and I assumed it was like a big box store where you pay at the end.

So here I am like, what, 6 or 7 maybe? Going from table to table and just yoinking knick-knacks into my little bag. Nobody stopped me or otherwise corrected me. I still don't see anywhere to "check out"! I end up just leaving, basically.

Cut to me waiting in the lunch line and just getting straight up shaken down and accosted for cash by some authoritarian staff types. I just handed them the bag of spending money I'd been supplied with and I don't really remember what happened after that. Looking back though, those people were very mean to a confused child under 10, treating me like some deliberate criminal mastermind of petty-thievery lol.