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Ha. Fair point.
No, this was the kind of suspension where they put hooks through your skin, and then hoist you above the ground by the hooks.
(I do ride, but only street bikes. And IMO, for street bikes, unless you track your bike regularly, your stock suspension is likely just fine.)
I also wondered why you weren't trying your bike tricks over a foam pit.
Note that the tone of judgement can’t be helped when asking this, but why would one want to do this to begin with?
...Because? That's like asking why people climb Kilimanjaro, or K2. Because you want to know if you can.
And it turns out I can, it is kind of boring, and makes me feel carsick.
What...? is this a medical procedure ?
This should explain it. Well, visually, at least.