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Your fear of disappearing resonates the worst for me in regards to my daughter (4) doing so. It makes me want to vomit to think of her just gone, at the mercy of someone or something else, with no way to know where she is or how to save her. It rips my heart in half that so many parents throughout time have lived this exact nightmare and never received answers. I find some relief that I live in a very safe part of the world where child abductions rarely (if ever) happen, but there are a number of other ways your little girl can just vanish.
I wouldn't say this perpetually weighs on my conscience, but every time I remember it can happen, it really fucks with my head.
Watch Pixar's Coco, if you haven't already. To me the idea of a part of us living on after death in the memories of others is very comforting (for the ones who have not died - I don't think it'll matter to the dead person).
That's just parenting, mate. It makes you worry about all the details you never worried about before and it makes your hair turn grey and gives you sleepless nights. But all in all it's all worth it somehow.