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We need to save the planet, that's why you need to put a giant plug up your ass! Why? Well you see, Methane is a serious greenhouse gas, and despite your farts being miniscule compared to the massive releases from factory farms and other industries, eVErY liTtlE biT HeLps!!
You should really just not question it and live your life with this painful inconvenience because we all need to start somewhere. If everyone across the nation were to just start wearing a big butt plug at all times, we could reduce methane emissions by a whole 0.1%! And no, before you ask, the factory farms and other industries won't be doing a damn thing to reduce their emissions. So lube up that bussy honey, you gotta get into that green mentality, it's for the planet!