I had this problem around ten years ago where I wanted to be able to disable the esp (which prevents powerslides) in my VW Caddy. I found a hardware/software kit on aliexpress that went for around 30$. Maybe have a look there, I don't know how new your car is and what model it is, but if somebody made an aftermarket kit for your car, there might be a cheap copy of that available from china.
Mine worked fine, I could disable the annoying option where the car always gives 3 consecutive turning signals, no matter how short you move the lever. Also daytime lights could be enabled, and whatnot.
Turning off the esp was not even an option with this board computer unfortunately so I had to interrupt the power line of a sensor with a switch to archive that, which I found out on an obscure German forum thread years later...
Read up on Xmpp or matrix as good alternatives.