I stopped using /e/OS last year and switched to CalyxOS.
The problem I had comes probably from the fact that /e/ tries to cover as many phones as possible (almost 230 as of now) without having a big enough testing pool, so stuff would break constantly even on the "officially supported" devices. And when you pointed out your problem on their forum, the answer you met was frequently something like "the problem is in your phone model, we can't do a lot about it".
Calyx instead supports only Pixel phones and a couple others, including the FP4, it's always tested for good (they have both a stable and a beta branch you can easily switch between) and their android and microG versions are usually more up to date.
Oh, and the Calyx community is one on the nicest and most helpful on the planet

Graphene do not support fairphone, but you can use calyxos, which supports fairphone (with verified boot?), and it is more up to date.

In general, I think calyx is probably more up-to-date and secure, with vanilla android experience. /e/ has its own unique athetics, and a SSO cloud service powered by nextcloud (last time I checked, nextcloud dont have good E2EE support, so I personally avoid putting my stuff on a nextcloud server hosted by others. But it is your choice)