this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2023
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 339 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (6 children)

Many years ago I had to try to debug a memory manager written by a really talented software engineer, with an interesting take on naming things…

  • He referred to blocks of memory as “cookies”.

  • He had a temporary variable named “handy” because it was handy to have around.

  • He had a second temporary variable that referenced the first one that he called “son_of_handy”.

  • If corruption was detected in a block of memory then it would set the flag “shit_cookie_corrupt”.

  • If too many cookies were corrupt then the system would halt by calling the function “oh_shit_oh_shit_oh_shit”.

[–] [email protected] 149 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago (1 children)

To be honest I'd like to see his resume, kinda wanna hire him

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 year ago

That was close to 30 years ago - a DOS memory manager written prior to Windows 3.0. He’s likely retired now…

[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 year ago (1 children)

proposal to rename exit() to oh_shit_oh_shit_oh_shit()

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 year ago (3 children)

screw_you_guys_im_going_home()

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

fuck_this_shit_im_outta_here()

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

In the 90s there was a Redhat distro called Cartman.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Red Hat 6.1, that was my first Linux distro.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

screw_you_im_gonna_go_play_minecraft()

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago

I will keep this legacy alive within my code

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago

Okay yeah but I know what all those variables do

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Sounds like my type of guy.