Programmer Humor

32721 readers

540 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
No NSFW content.
Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

402

MySQL moment (lemmy.world)

submitted 9 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

34 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Err, no? At what point did I claim to be an expert?

It doesn't take a genius to realise that serving 100-record chunks of a billion record dataset using limit 100 offset 582760200 is never gonna perform well

Or that converting indexed time columns to strings and doing string comparisons on them makes every query perform an entire table scan, which is obvious if you actually take the time to look at the query plan (spoiler: they don't)

"Why can't the system handle more than 2 queries per second? This database sucks"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

I didn't mean it so serious. I just tried to express that you seem to have experience with it and I am wondering what you have to deal with. I am sorry if it came across negatively.