this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2023
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[–] [email protected] 153 points 1 year ago (9 children)

I am good with knowing my deficiencies. What sucks is being told that they are my fault because I should be "smart enough to overcome them".

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

People who say that are just trying to be a dick to you. Say something soul-searing to them in response and they'll stop.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Most people just don't understand that being really good at something doesn't mean you can't be terrible at something else. Like, I can problem solve a wide variety of things, but there are a few things that I just have no success at even if I know the problem and the likely solution.

The most infuriating one for me is that if I can't see something then I cannot line it up right. A screw or bolt out of view means I have a 50/50 chance of ever getting it started even though I know how I can move it to fit in. Like I know to tilt and whatever, but without a visual frame it becomes impossible. A ton of people just yell me I am not trying hard enough, even though attempting to learn for decades hasn't worked out for me.

But with even the slightest view I can get it started no problem. Being told I am not trying hard enough is infuriating when I am just being honest that it is my limitation.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Alternatively, I've met plenty of people who are so desperate to climb the ladder that, even knowing full well their deficiencies, they climb to a level where those deficiencies become detrimental for everyone around them.

If you aren't a good organizer, and climb into an organization centric position, that's 100% on you. If you aren't a good leader and take a coordinating position, that's on you. If you aren't good at lining up blind screws, and you knew that was a core competency for your job when you took it, that's on you. It's not that I expect you to be "smart enough to overcome" whatever you're bad at, but you shouldn't be in positions where something you're bad at, but can't overcome, is a major part of your duties.

At that point, yes, I'm going to be "mean" and directly point out your deficiencies.

Can you tell I had a fun meeting today?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

It seems like you're describing the phenomenon where people get promoted up until the point where they don't do a good job anymore.

I never knew how people can not see that the position was not for them and still accept it, and even work the job for years.

I could take a job where I had the technical responsibility for what my team makes, but I don't ever want to be anybodys boss. All of that personal stuff on a day to day basis, negotiating pay, etc just isn't for me.

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