this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (4 children)

Wait til we discover the launchpads in the geologic record.

I have it on good authority that the dinosaurs didn't go extinct, they predicted the Chicxulub collision and escaped the Earth on arks. Of course they realized that their warm blooded servitor species would survive the impact and evolve sentience much like their own (they created our genomes, so it was easy to predict), so they hid the launchpads until we would be ready to see them.

The arks landed on Planet 9 (the big one, not the lil one), since it was less likely to be hit by similar events. They hollowed it out, helping to create Pluto and Ceres, and have been living in there ever since.

Discovering the launchpads will show them that we've achieved sufficient technological prowess for them to reveal themselves to us. I can't wait!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I hate it so much that I can't tell if you're dead serious or joking...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

What could be more serious than the future of humanity in the stars? Once we reunite with our glorious reptilian creators, we will ascend to the stars!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

Yeah please stop?

I know you're kidding and all but right now I'm getting severe "I have a podcast about this" vibes from you and it makes me feel rather... Aggressive.

I'm so extremely done with dumb people shouting their voices on the internet, running the world, that I seriously consider the internet a failure, and humanities biggest mistake ever. Smart people keep to themselves, do their own thing, and all the retards out there start shouting their stupidities and theories and whatnot. And whoever shoots the loudest, wins. After this last trump victory, it's been a bit of "the last straw" for me.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

As a subscriber to /c/insanepeoplefacebook it took me a couple paragraphs to figure out if you were serious.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

When the dinosaurs send arks to bring us home to glorious Planet 9, I'll make sure to save you a seat.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

I eagerly await the ascension.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Took the words right out of my mouth.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Musta been while you were kissing me.

Edit:

Oh you took the words right out of my mouth,

And I swear it's true I was just about to say I love you,

Looove youuu!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

It's going to be glorious.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Then they escaped to the Delta Quadrant.

All this was foretold in that documentary sent back from the future: Star Trek Voyager.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

The dinosaurs want us to be successful and join them, that's why they keep helping us!