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The volume on 22 will be a lot higher than a non default port. With 22 open my router was basically getting DDOS’d at times
Agreed. Anyone who thinks it's ok to just expose ssh on 22 to the internet has never looked at their logs. The port will be found in minutes, and be hammered by thousands of login attempts by multiple bots 24/7. Sure you can block repeat failed logins, but that list will just always be growing.
Then using something like fail2ban to block bad acting connections is far more effective and you even get a security benefit out of it.
Also, when a few scripts try to connect via ssh DDOS your router then something is messed up. Either a shitty router from 20 years ago or you have a Bandwidth lower than 100kbps.
I have fail2ban running on the server itself, also it was a lot more than “a few scripts”