this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2024
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I was denied a mathematics education, for real. I can't even do long division, nevermind that squiggly F shit. I thought that stuff was only for astrophysicists.
I want to learn basic maths, but I'm in a 'learned helplessness' mindset where I can't even get through basic sums and equations intended for children (I'm old as fuck now).
I was diagnosed with autism a few years back, which kinda made no sense. I would have expected rainman powers, but numbers just don't jive with my cunt of a brain. Maths is as inscrutable to me as people's faces or social cues.
I transferred schools in the middle of 10th grade, and the new Algebra class I landed in was several chapters ahead. I never caught up, but the teacher passed anyone who turned in literally anything for homework so I did that.
Now in my 30's I'm getting into indie game design, and I need that gap filled so I can write the code I need. So I went to the local thrift shop and picked up a couple old textbooks (since it's safe to assume that nothing groundbreaking has happened in the field of basic algebra in the past twenty years) for fifty cents and I've been working my way through them. I don't understand everything that's happening, but I'm pushing ahead with the faith that somewhere along the line things will "click".
You might enjoy Freya Holmér's videos - I mostly know her for her excellent mathsy video essays, but she has loads of videos about "maths for game Devs" that might be useful.