this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2023
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What does "out of my league" even mean?
The concept of someone being "out of my league" is a myth. We really should stop putting people in these categories and instead see everyone as an equal challenge. By labeling someone as "out of my league," I am limiting myself and degrading the people who I think are "in my league." It's better to focus on people we're genuinely interested in and not place them on such a high pedestal that they feel they need to be worshipped. Rather place them high enough to think they are prized. The people we date are the ones who we think are great, and we believe they could make us great too.
I feel we should remember that no one is out of anyone's league. We should rather focus our attention on a person we're genuinely interested in and challenge ourselves.
You never know what might happen until you try.
Easy to say when you win the genetic lottery.
I absolutely did not win the genetic lottery. On a very good day I might be a 4. I also have a confusing to me amount of romantic success. Like, dating multiple people, and this having been the case for years, successful. It's not about winning the lottery, it's about cultivating yourself as a person, and being open to opportunities.
Then cultivate the idea, that the other person is also, in fact, a person and gets a ton of advances.
Especially as a man it is difficult to approach a "high league" woman, because she gets approached by tons of guys and you have to convince her somehow that you're a) not another creep and b) actually maybe worth her intention.
I'm not trying to blame women here, just keep your eyes open to what good looking women have to endure in some circumstances. That's horrible. And blocking many advances by default is kind of self defense.