this post was submitted on 01 Sep 2024
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Mildly Infuriating
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If my retail experience is any indication, acknowledging customers in this situation is a bad idea. Before you know it, the conversation turns to "I just need one thing!" Or "I promise I'll be really quick!" and you have to become the asshole to tell them no... Even though the store hours are clearly listed on the front door.
Or if you agree even once, the conversation could easily become "but you did it for me/my friend last time!"
I've literally had people sneak into the store using an exit, then act all indignant because I tell them to leave. You give some of these fuckers an inch, they'll take a mile.
My favorite way out of that situation was to tell them that the registers were automatically shut down at closing. Literally no way to ring up a purchase. It worked most of the time
That's why there's the JADE acronym. You never justify, argue, defend, or explain. That makes them think there's a chance if they just counter every single thing you say.
"Can't you just do it on paper?"
"Can't you fuck off?"
Sure, just let me buy this one thing first.
Ok, I'll ring you up tomorrow, just wait right here.
locks doors
"oh that's okay, I have cash, coin, and check"
I usually lead with, “That’s out of my control,” or “that’s above my pay grade.” Most of the time people get it.
My go-to was the ovens have already entered shutdown mode and cannot be restarted. There was no such thing of course.